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I feel like I have been asleep at the wheel, the past months have been a blur.

Almost one and a half years ago I arrived in Kathmandu from Sydney. I was at high risk of burning out, I probably was burned out but didn't realise it. I had a tough time of things over the course of a few months.

An earthquake had devastated my partners country of Nepal. My cousin was murdered weeks before. My startup was failing. My consulting business was busy with a few clients but I had to work insane hours to keep up with the workload. I was working weird hours working with developers in Pune, India; who much more suited to working on an American timezone.

I was utterly exhausted, drained of all motivation to work on my startup and simply going through the motions. We packed our bags, left Sydney and moved to Kathmandu.

I'm still here...finally..I feel like I am slowly getting back on my feet, back to myself again. It has taken a solid twelve months to get here but I feel like I'm finally awake. I have goals, I have targets and above all I know that I am going to achieve every single one of them.

Living in Kathmandu has not been easy. I've had family all around me but we've gone through an earthquake and a fuel crisis together. Moving from one crisis to the next I felt incapable of bursting out of this hole that I was experiencing, but, I think I'm through the worst of it.

I've really isolated myself these past 2 years. My friendships have become difficult to maintain, simply because of distance. I found myself often preferring to focus on work than go out and socialise in a language I simply have not grasped. It's a pressure I haven't really been able to put into words, some associate it with being an entrepreneur and find it natural, others say I must be just reaching middle age. Personally, I find I've been experiencing a form of depression. I'm OK, don't worry.

I returned from San Francisco last month, invited through Conx Jobs and Google to their demo day. The experience was wonderful, meeting such driven entrepreneurs, each conversation had an emphasis on moving forward with the business and really making an impact. I've returned full of energy and motivated for what could come in the future.

So what's next? Well, I just moved into a new office in Kathmandu. I'm hiring staff, we are expanding. I'm learning that I cannot do everything and I must delegate much more in the future. I know I'm a workaholic and I must concentrate on my own health and my relationships with my family. Onwards, no longer asleep, accelerating forward.

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Jonathan Clarke


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Jonathan Clarke

@beilabs

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